Time and time again, it seems like things are going no where but downhill. Do I really need this much sadness in my life? No. But why am I not cutting my losses yet?

Because once upon a time, it was beautiful. And I’m a fool who keeps turning back to look at the past.

Let time be the judge

As the cynic and the optimist battle it out, time sits on the judging panel.

We have just reached half-time. The optimist seems to be having the upper hand for now but the cynic is always just a step or two behind. Who will emerge victorious? Only time can tell.

On one hand, the cynic does seem to have a better track record. But on the other hand, I can’t help but to hope for the best for the optimist. Is that how people who root for underdogs feel? Silly, but hopeful?

It’s all a bit too much to digest at the moment. After all, we’re still in the early stages of the battle. Things really could go either way from here on out. Who is to say either party will even make it past the qualifying round?

For now, let’s sit back and let the reality of things sink in while we wait for the second half of the match, shall we?

New hobby

I have never been one to play any sports enthusiastically except for roller blading and ice skating when I was younger. Even those I’ve stopped because I don’t own a pair of roller blades anymore and nobody I know likes to ice skate.

Recently though, I’ve started playing darts for fun with a bunch of friends and it escalated to a point where practically all of us bought a set of our own darts and meet up regularly to play. Suddenly the house darts just isn’t good enough anymore when your friends all have their own fancy sets. Ah, the wonders of peer pressure. 😅

Granted, though it’s been only a couple of months and I’ve not even been diligently practicing, I do find the sport kinda fun. It’s very rare that I don’t completely suck at a sport (though some might say it’s not really a real sport), considering my horrendous lack of hand eye coordination.

Plus, it’s an opportunity for the gang to meet up regularly instead of just seeing each other once in a blue moon. So that’s always nice.

Maybe if we continue to keep this up, I might even finally be considered good one day. Fat chance, but a girl can dream, can’t she?

Even if I don’t improve much, I guess I can still console myself with the fact that my first ever set of darts is really pretty. #shallow


Managing Expectations

The thing about expectations is that it is often times not met. That’s just the way life is. Things go wrong, people go wrong, and life just is a bitch.

I find that when I expect certain things from certain people who have repeatedly shown tendencies for letting me down, I end up hurting myself with disappointment and anger when things don’t go the way I expected them to.

This is where managing expectations come in. Sure, some people want to believe the best in everyone. They choose to have faith even when faced repeatedly with disappointment. But of course you already know I’m not like that. There’s only so much disappointment I can take before I combust. It’s happened before, and no doubt it will happen again.

The silly thing however, is that I can’t help but to have expectations. Then I’d be hit by disappointment. Once, twice, thrice… Until it reaches a point when I finally move beyond hurt and disappointment into the realm of… Numbness.

Yep, numbness. When people give me something to expect, I’d mentally and emotionally brace myself for the inevitable disappointment that will be coming. That way, when it finally comes, the bitter taste of disappointment would be easier to swallow because I’ve already expected its arrival. And instead of the steep dive, it’d instead be a gradual descent. Yes, I’d still hit the bottom, but now the impact is lessened.

That’s not the way I’d like to be. But that’s the way I prevent myself from receiving the full brunt of the trauma. It’s the same way your skin becomes thicker and more calloused the more you put it through. Ultimately, it’s to protect yourself from harm.

Sometimes I do wonder if it’s just me setting myself up for disappointment or if it’s just my luck meeting people who cannot help disappointing me. Or maybe it’s a sign that the two parties are just not meant to expect or fulfill each other’s expectations?

If A can only give 75% at most and B expects a minimum of 85% every time, would it be better if B would just move on and find another party who can at least give 85% consistently and let A find someone else who’d be perfectly fine with 75%? Or should B manage his expectations and lower it to 75% so that he won’t be disappointed with A?

I guess it boils down to how much B wants to make it work with A?

Then again, I guess you can flip it and ask if A should work on giving more than 75% in order to meet B’s expectations instead.

Would you then be able to see if it’s A or B who would be more willing to put in the effort to make it work?

Or maybe they should just both meet half way at 80%? Easier said than done.

Ah, I’m rambling and I don’t even know if this all makes sense at this point. Maybe when I come back to this in a couple of hours I’d be wondering what on earth I was rambling on about.

Good morning

Hahaha karma in action this glorious morning.

Some asshole motorcyclist cuts into my lane and turns around to flip me off.

Next thing I see? *Boom* He hits the stationary car in front and falls off the bike. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Let’s see you try to flip me off from the floor now, eh?

Thank you for making my morning, asshole. I wish I’d taken a photo of his glorious glorious fail but alas, I’m a responsible driver who doesn’t mess with my phone while driving.

Not so fun swerving through traffic like a maniac and flipping people off now, is it? :)

I live to eat

Here’s a selection of nom nom that didn’t manage to make it onto my Instagram (because we all know my Instagram is just filled with either pictures of food or my face).

imageIchiban boshi @ Sunway Giza Mall.

imageSae Ma Eul Korean BBQ @ Solaris Mont Kiara.

imageSmoking Hog @ SS2.

imageThe Bee @ Jaya One.

imageThe Bee @ Jaya One.

imageCurry House Coco Ichibanya @ One Utama.

imageIchiro @ One Utama.

imageJust Pie @ One Utama.

imageDamansara Uptown Hokkien Mee @ Damansara Utama.