This is me.

I’ve been craving for food nonstop these couple of days. So much so that even I’m scaring myself FML.

It started off innocently enough. I had lunch on Saturday around 12.30pm and by 5.30pm, I was positively famished. I brushed it off, thinking I was just tired and burnt extra energy running around. A couple of hours after dinner, I was hungry again… Tried to ignore it the best I could but I caved and had soup around midnight… #zeroselfcontrol
The worst part was that not even two hours later, I was hungry again! Went to bed with a gnawing hunger and woke up feeling like I could eat a cow.

Repeated the same shit on Sunday. No matter what I ate, I can’t stay satisfied for more than a couple of hours! My scumbag brain is constantly imagining all sorts of delicious things even when I know my stomach is already full.

This is so torturous… Just give me back my normal appetite wtf. I already have a hard enough time trying to lose weight as it is already. This whatever hormonal shit ain’t helping.

I’m such a glutton.

Warm and fuzzy

Now that I’ve had both, I realised why it’s good to have a remote control with a tiny panel covering everything but the power button.

For people like me who likes to keep everything within arm’s reach (read: on my bed) so I wouldn’t even have to stretch too far to get something, much less getting out of bed for it, a tiny ass remote control like this just presents too much opportunities for accidental pressing – which led to me sleeping with the temperature set to 28°C last night.

Who the fuck puts this many buttons on such a small remote control?!?!

It was so freaking warm that I had nightmares of being too warm and woke up from being too warm wtf. And when I groped for the remote control in the middle of the night, I couldn’t see the temperature because it was pitch black and there was no way in hell I’m getting up to turn the lights on.

And so I’ve had to endure till day break and set the temperature back to a more reasonable number. (I’m lazy, can you tell?)

This is not the first time it’s happened. Aircond makers, for the love of all things good, please make your remote controls with a tiny panel from now on. No freaking one keeps their controller in the wall slot. No one.

And thus ends my extremely random rant about an aircond remote control.

Miracle Worker, Not.

Do I look like a freaking miracle worker? No. I do not. I most definitely do not perform freaking miracles because if I did, I wouldn’t be here. I’d probably be at some place with thousands and thousands of believers kissing the very ground I walk on.

But I am not, which is why I am here. Here where somehow some people still ridiculously think I can perform miracles. Honestly, I do not know if it’s the lack of brain cells or common sense, but some people are just very ignorant and oblivious of how things work.

The world is not a wish granting factory. It does not cater to your every whim and fancy. Similarly, I am not blue, nor am I a genie. I do not exist to simply wave my magic wand and make your wishes come true.

It’s easy enough to open your mouth and request for the sun and the moon. I too, can ask for the stars. Asking is one thing, being realistic is another thing. If you sit on your fat ass all the time spouting hot air from both ends, do yourself and everyone else a favour, don’t go around expecting miraculous things to happen at the drop of a hat.

It’s not only unrealistic, unreasonable, and unfeasible, it also bugs the shit out of everyone who has to suffer through your bullshit.

And everyone who knows me knows how much of a tolerance I have towards bullshit.

A Whole New Ball Game

Human are illogical creatures.

A weight has finally been lifted off. I know I’ve been unhappy for awhile now.

Logically, I knew what to do. Logically, I should have done it long ago. Logically, I should have held to my guns the first time around. Logically, I knew the right thing to do isn’t always the easiest thing to do.

But I’m only human after all.

Luckily for me, human are also resilient creatures.

I know I will be fine. I know it’s all in my mind. I know it will take awhile.

But hey, if I’m known for anything, it’s my ability to bounce back like a ball. And this tiny ball bounces fast! So look out!